A Course In Relationships

Overview

Sexual Politics

Sexual Liberation = Personal & Social Chaos

  • Dyonisius (Euripides) – nothing controlled Pentheus except lust
    • Samson w/ Delila
    • David w/ Bathsheba
    • Solomon w/ many women
  • Cicero – “it’s easier to conquer people who surrender to pleasure”
  • Augustine – slave to one hundred vices. Promote vice = promote slavery, which is political control
  • Burke – intemperate minds cannot be free people
  • James (Bible) – lusts carry people away
  • Aquinas – lust dumbs people down, stupefies them
  • Marry Wollstonecraft – early fem, reason will extinguish itself to rationalize pleasure

Social Chaos requires Social Control

  • Le Marquis de Sade control passion = control behavior = make people do what you want
  • Freud – sexual motives are at the root of everything we think and do, control sex = ctrl all
  • Reich – destroy religion through sex
  • Huxley (Brave New World) – control people’s labor through sex
  • MTV founder quote – control people’s emotions, habits, values
  • Michel Foucault – recreating the self through sex
  • Solomon – foolish youth led away by woman like ox to slaughter
  • Quote from Libido Dominandi

 

Women’s Liberation

Feminism has taught women to be masculine competitors – they are not taught any of the feminine virtues… Modern education (installed, also, with plenty of feminism) has taught men to be feminine subservients – they are not taught any of the masculine virtues. (Dalrock)

Three waves of feminism.

1) Not to be oppressed by Men

2) Be equal to Men

3) Be Men, Dominate Men

  1. Late 1800s-early 1900s. Right to vote, equal dignity with men, right to work, marriage is slavery, right to preach/minister. (Seneca Falls Declaration)
  2. Mid 1900s-1960s. Sexual freedom, radical liberation, right to opportunities to be equal with men and male roles. Need abortion to be unencumbered to compete with men. Wage gaps. Sexually interchangeable. No difference between women and men. Redefine family and gender roles, radically. Woman will overtake man. Woman will be bread winner.
  3. Late 1900s to Today. Do not need men. Men are obsolete. The end of men. Demonization of men. Right to power. Run the world. Right to orgasm. Right to free healthcare. Absolute Autonomy. Remake Womanhood itself. (Pornography is women exerting power over men.) Examples: Dworkin, Firestone, Solanas. Feminism is popular and powerful.

Feminism is a variant of socialized Marxism.

  • RedStockings Feminists.
  • Cultural or social Marxism is an ideology that stirs up grievances and turns society into a bunch of squabbling factions (HT: CH). Marx divided society into oppressor and oppressed. What he meant in economic terms – bourgeois and proletariat – cultural Marxists replace with any terms they please: men/women, white/black, heterosexual/homosexual, native/immigrant, majority/minority. The terms are different but the categories are the same. As are the methods of the oppressed overthrowing the oppressor. The goals are also the same: a classless society.

    However, although Marxist movements did succeed in destroying the previous classes, they failed to destroy class itself. Rather, they merely replaced the old classes with new ones. Instead of the bourgeois and the proletariat, they replaced them not with the equality of classless society but with a political elite class and an impoverished masses class. So also, instead of doing away with race, the social Marxists who push racial grievance do not equalize the races or do away with race. Rather, they amass all minority races into what they call “multi-ethnicity,” in order actively to oppress the majority race whom they term supremacist, racist, white privileged, and so on. These are all Marxian usages of language. Yet, for all their rhetoric about racial equality and reconciliation, they’ve merely created new masters and new servants, and have further alienated instead of dialectically synthesized the races. Likewise, those social Marxists who focus on gender have not done away with gender but have sought to arrogate power to the “oppressed” in order to destroy the “oppressor” whom they term the “patriarchy.” They have not done away with genders but segregated them, opposed them, set them at variance and war. The same goes for self-styled sexual revolutionaries and homosexuals who gather all the “oppressed” “sexual minorities” into one group they call LGBTQ+ to fight against, shame, threaten, silence, intimidate, and excommunicate their cisgender heterosexual traditional-marriage oppressors. The present immigration debate, likewise, swirls around oppressors and oppressed classes and aims at destroying definitional and physical boundaries between the two classes.

    Finally, all social Marxists each in their particular rivulets have begun to realize that they really are all members of one ideological stream and thus they have begun to see that their movements “intersect.” “Intersectionality” is the new term for gathering all the social Marxist branches into one potent, unified torrent to fight their common enemy: the bourgeois, white, Christian, heterosexual, traditional, monogamous, Western male.

Feminism Came After Men Built The West

“It is possible to interpret much of history as men oppressing women, especially if one does not look too closely and seeks only confirming evidence. But just as plausibly, one can spin a very different interpretation. Here’s another possible way to tell the story. Women kept themselves conveniently apart from the brutal, risky, and often painful strife and competition. Men fought bloody battles. Other men risked their savings in commerce, with some making fortunes and others going bankrupt. Men fought, risked, struggled, sought, suffered, and triumphed. Women mostly kept out of that.

Certainly in the early years there was nothing to prevent groups of women from forming into military groups to fight battles for territory. Nor did anything prevent groups of women from engaging in manufacture and trade to create wealth. In fact a few women did, but only a very few.

Only after a long wait, when the men had built up society into magnificent social structures with large corporations and other institutions, then only did the women come forward and demand to be given a place at the table they had not helped to build. Only after most of the risks and costs had been greatly tamed and everything was fairly safe did women venture forth. And even then they were not satisfied with getting an equal place: They demanded that the social structures the men built must be revised to make them more hospitable to women. Women insisted on affirmative action, special centers and support groups, and the changing of rules to suit their needs. These demands continue today and seem likely to go on forever, as women insist that there be special offices and accommodations and oversight bodies to take care of their special needs and demands and feelings. Women have played on men’s natural love for women and protectiveness toward women, exploiting men’s concern to convince men to switch things around for the betterment of women.”

— Roy F. Baumeister, “Is There Anything Good About Men?: How Cultures Flourish by Exploiting Men”

Feminism Is It’s Own Worst Enemy

  • Lower birth rates
  • Lower marriage rates
  • Less mothers raising their kids.
  • More loneliness
  • More sadness
  • Less happiness
  • They can’t work forever like men
  • They’re not independent like men
  • Life is not actually like Sex and the City, where you can ride the carousel until your mid-30’s and still somehow easily snag Mr. Big and then have a happy family once you’ve “had your fun” and “found yourself”.
  • Women increasingly become leftist, liberal, radical, etc. (Voting patterns)
  • Leads to the Destruction of civilization.
  • Women’s liberation destroys nations. How this happens.

Effects of Feminism:

  1. They don’t want a provider. So men stop becoming providers and start becoming players.
  2. They don’t want commitment. So men stop being responsible, stable, trustworthy, adn become clever, cute, fun. MGTOW
  3. They don’t want traditional dating. So men don’t even know how to date, they vascilate between friends and sex with little to no romance. The dance is over.
  4. Most of them aren’t all that excited about the idea of having a family or anything serious like that. So no one prepares for having families by learning household economics, or quickly gaining skills for long-term employment.

They have been sold a lie that it all lasts forever. But wait until they broach the age of 30 and that is the script that gets flipped. By then their male peers have wised up and are not eager to play along with the new paradigm, especially when there are plenty of younger gals acting out the aforementioned plot. Sad situation, really.

Feminism’s search for equality. – Martin Van Creveld

 

The Market Place

The Market Place Then, Now

  • Like the economy
    • The American dollar could buy as much bread in 1800 as it could in 1900, but considerably less in 2000. Similarly, a sexual encounter is less meaningful, significant, valuable today than it was in 1900. It purchases less goods – less commitments, less security, less relationship, less marriage, less love, less family, less kids, less prosperity. Further, women’s bodies are less valuable, their feminine virtues as well, women are needed less as women, men are needed less as men.
    • More on comparison to economy
    • Hank Williams Sr. sang about the sexual market place long ago: Window Shopping

Required reading for high school seniors:

Women reach their sexual market peak in their early 20’s while men don’t reach theirs until their mid to late 30’s.

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters. — Jane Austen, Pride And Prejudice

More and more women continue to postpone marriage past their late 20s, and those who do so are finding it harder to marry in their 30s.

 

Socio–Sexual Hierarchy

Intro To Game

Due to changes in mating behavior and pair bonding brought on by technology, shifting demographics, migration to cities from rural towns, universal suffrage, promotion of sexually promiscuous behaviors, and destruction of traditional sex roles, most men do not have the ability or knowledge to successfully reproduce with a modern woman on a comparable attractiveness and socioeconomic level. Their “natural” self will lead to reproductive failure without purposeful intervention that increases their attractiveness in the eyes of women who are actively encouraged to seek out high-value males. “Game” is a collection of socially-based tactics and reproducible behaviors that increase a man’s sexual attractiveness to women and therefore his access to reproduction. It can range from a trivial aid like an opening line that starts a conversation with a woman in an interesting manner to a physical move that escalates intimacy in the bedroom in a way that is most likely to lead to sex. Its primary goal is to give men a set of tools and beliefs that allow him to more easily enter sexual relationships with the women he desires. In modern Western societies, a man who doesn’t at least subconsciously understand game concepts is unlikely to have sex at all. Game is ultimately a response to signals that women in any environment are displaying, giving them what they want in sexual partners based on their desires and tastes of the day. These desires are undergoing regular change, meaning that game is a constantly shifting set of outward rules and practices while the inward game beliefs governing those practices remain mostly static, based on known biological truths that stem from animal reproductive science and studies based on female human sexual behavior.

Related:

 

Vox vs. Chateau Heartiste Translator:

Vox Alpha : CH Apex Alpha
Vox Beta : CH Alpha
Vox Sigma : CH Lone-Wolf Alpha

Vox Delta : CH Beta
Vox Gamma : CH Damaged/Lone-Wolf Beta

Vox Omega : CH Omega

(Apex) Alpha: The alpha is the tall, good-looking guy who is the center of both male and female attention. The classic star of the football team who is dating the prettiest cheerleader. The successful business executive with the beautiful, stylish, blonde, size zero wife. All the women are attracted to him, while all the men want to be him, or at least be his friend. At a social gathering like a party, he’s usually the loud, charismatic guy telling self-flattering stories to a group of attractive women who are listening with interest. However, alphas are only interested in women to the extent that they exist for the alpha’s gratification, physical and psychological, they are actually more concerned with their overall group status.

(Alpha) Beta: Betas are the good-looking guys who aren’t as uniformly attractive or socially dominant as the Alpha, but are nevertheless confident, attractive to women, and do well with them. At the party, they are the loud guy’s friends who showed up with the alcohol and who are flirting with the tier one women and cheerfully pairing up with the tier two women. Betas tend to genuinely like women and view them in a somewhat optimistic manner, but they don’t have a lot of illusions about them either. Betas tend to be happy, secure in themselves, and are up for anything their alpha wants to do. When they marry, it is not infrequently to a woman who was one of the alpha’s former girlfriends.

(Beta) Delta: The normal guy. Deltas are the great majority of men. They can’t attract the most attractive women, so they usually aim for the second-tier women with very limited success, and stubbornly resist paying attention to all of the third-tier women who are comfortably in their league. This is ironic, because deltas would almost always be happier with their closest female equivalents. When a delta does manage to land a second-tier woman, he is constantly afraid that she will lose interest in him and will, not infrequently, drive her into the very loss of interest he fears by his non-stop dancing of attendance upon her. In a social setting, the deltas are the men clustered together in groups, each of them making an occasional foray towards various small gaggles of women before beating a hasty retreat when direct eye contact and engaged responses are not forthcoming. Deltas tend to put the female sex on pedestals and have overly optimistic expectations of them; if a man rhapsodizes about his better half or is an inveterate White Knight, he is almost certainly a delta. Deltas like women, but find them mysterious, confusing, and are sometimes secretly a little afraid of them. Gets friend-zoned, put on lay-a-way for marriage later. 

(Damaged Beta) Gamma: The introspective, the unusual, the unattractive, and all too often the bitter. Gammas are often intelligent, usually unsuccessful with women, and not uncommonly all but invisible to them, the gamma alternates between placing women on pedestals and hating the entire sex. This mostly depends upon whether an attractive woman happened to notice his existence or not that day. Too introspective for their own good, gammas are the men who obsess over individual women for extended periods of time and supply the ranks of stalkers, psycho-jealous ex-boyfriends, and the authors of excruciatingly romantic rhyming doggerel. In the unlikely event they are at the party, they are probably in the corner muttering darkly about the behavior of everyone else there… sometimes to themselves. Gammas tend to have have a worship/hate relationship with women, the current direction of which is directly tied to their present situation. However, they are sexual rejects, not social rejects.

Omega: The truly unfortunate. Omegas are the social losers who were never in the game. Sometimes creepy, sometimes damaged, often clueless, and always undesirable. They’re not at the party. It would never have crossed anyone’s mind to invite them in the first place. Omegas are either totally indifferent to women or hate them with a borderline homicidal fury.

(Lone Wolf Alpha) Sigma: The outsider who doesn’t play the social game and manage to win at it anyhow. The sigma is hated by alphas because sigmas are the only men who don’t accept or at least acknowledge, however grudgingly, their social dominance. (NB: Alphas absolutely hate to be laughed at and a sigma can often enrage an alpha by doing nothing more than smiling at him.) Everyone else is vaguely confused by them. In a social situation, the sigma is the man who stops in briefly to say hello to a few friends accompanied by a Tier 1 girl that no one has ever seen before. Sigmas like women, but tend to be contemptuous of them. They are usually considered to be strange. Gammas often like to think they are sigmas, failing to understand that sigmas are not social rejects, they are at the top of the social hierarchy despite their refusal to play by its rules.

 

Dating

The Deregulation Of The Sexual Marketplace

  • Boundriless Sex and Birth Control. Much of American political, economic, and cultural life is an attack on traditional boundaries. Here is an article from several years back penned by my friend, Bret, on birth control. See the quote from the Washington Post on the Lambeth Conference, a meeting of Anglicans wherein a major Protestant denomination first blessed birth control use. The comment, in a secular newspaper, represents a far more traditional offering than you would hear from most Protestant ethicists today. “Carried to its logical conclusion, the committee’s report, if carried into effect, would sound the death-knell of marriage as a holy institution by establishing degrading practices which would encourage indiscriminate immorality. The suggestion that the use of legalized contraceptives would be “careful and restrained” is preposterous.” The Washington Post, March 22, 1931
  • Hypergamy – marrying-up. 80% of women give their attention, hopes, affections, time, themselves to 20% of men. Another site with similar chart. (Social Scientist Dr. Baumeister of Florida State confirms)

“In a totally liberal sexual system certain people have a varied and exciting erotic life; others are reduced to m*** and solitude. Economic liberalism is an extension of the domain of the struggle its extension to all ages and all classes of society. Sexual liberalism is likewise an extension of the domain of the struggle, its extension to all ages and all classes of society.” Michel Houellebecq, father of the sexual market place

The free market intrudes into relationships. “A free market has winners and losers, and the same applies to relationships in a society that does not enforce monogamy.”

4th Gen Dating

  • First Gen – This began from the Peace of Westphalia in 1648, in which the modern nation states of Europe were created, until the American Civil War in 1861. Think of it like the orderly lines and columns of the Napoleonic Era in which armies meet on a pre-defined battlefield aiming to win a decisive battle.
  • Second Gen – This began with the French in World War 1 after trenches, barbed wire, artillery and fast firing guns made open orderly charges suicidal. Think now of the trench warfare of WW1 in which the artillery pounds a position for a week and then the infantry runs in to occupy the battered enemy lines. The goal is to kill enemy soldiers, destroy his equipment, and advance the line.
  • Third Gen – This developed concurrently but developed by the Germans and is best embodied in the Blitzkrieg. Defensively, it sought not to hold a line but to instead draw enemies in and cut them off. Offensively it sought to bypass (rather than destroy) enemy strongholds then roll them up from the rear. This is “maneuver warfare”.
  • Fourth Gen – This style existed before the Peace of Westphalia and has come back again now that the ordered nations are breaking down. Wars are no longer fought as one state army against another – they are fought by clans, gangs, tribes, and ideological fanatics. There is often no clear distinction between “military” and “civilian” participants. On the ground it resembles the hit and run of guerrilla warfare.

Bro–Alpha Culture:

Article from Vice arguing in defense of bro-alphas. Real men are no longer needed, so males stop being traditional men who go out and dominate and serve and protect and marry and provide. They turn inward and focus on male appearance, male beauty, male sexiness, male posturing, male fun, male friends – hot male bodies, hot male looks, hot male fun, hot male friends….hot male sex.

Feminism —> Women should be like men —> men are not needed as men —> men stop producing, creating, dominating, heterosexual nature —> men become aimless, play things, effeminate, homosexual

  • Women should be like men —> women are men (become more masculine) —> women are stronger, smarter, better than men (they become more masculine, forceful, direct, domineering) —> women do not need men (self-sustaining, independent, workaholics, enslaved to wages, jobs, careers, bills, debt) —> women need other women (in every way: support groups, “just my friends” mentality, “you go girl” mentality, sexually).
  • Men are not needed as men —> men stop playing the traditional male role of strong, protective provider, confident leader, creative risk-taking adventurer, romantic warrior poet, etc. Men are actually becoming weaker (see here also). All of those traditional male-roles are going away. Males no longer want them nor even know what those virtues and traits are or where to find them.
  • Rather, men become male-less, masculine-less, soft, playful, fun, irresponsible, aimless, effeminate, emotional, sensitive, concerned with appearance, beauty, looks, pleasure, friends — male looks, male appearance, male beauty, male pleasure, male friends —> they become concerned with the male sex and thus with male sex itself.

“This article is actually correct in its factual analysis, but wrong I think in its normative judgement. The article recognises correctly that men nowadays do not produce concrete things or serve higher causes, as such they engage in bro behaviour and alpha posturing. However the creation of an overt hypermasculine culture where man are conscious of themselves qua man as a group is reminiscent of classical cultures and the article confirms this with a gay sexual scene between “bros”. This is actually an observation I’ve made on several occasions, hypermasculinity inevitably leads to homosexuality. That an obsession and love for masculinity amongst men will lead to man lovers seems like almost a trivial truism. When men no longer create families, manufactures, or serve the will of God, this is the inevitable result. Perhaps the correct solution is that humanity, especially men, do need to realise that there exists causes and ends greater than themselves, not narcissistically turn inwards towards themselves to love themselves. Men may be at the head of various social settings but in the end unless they realise that they are still subordinate to God, an inward narcissistic turn is the inevitable result. This is why I view chadism or honour cultures in general with a certain skepticism, it seems like a lot of vacuous posturing.” — Foo

Thought experiment:

The thinking of an alpha male who gets married:

He was lots of fun, free, successful, risky, adventurous, dominant. Now he’s married with kids, and so he starts to plan, think long term, take less risks because it make hurt the kids or put them in danger. Maybe because of this he starts to fail in some things. His confidence is taken aback. He’s unsure of himself. His wife no longer sees the confident, sexy, powerful, dominant male, but something else – someone else. Basically, he’s now a Beta. But that’s not who she married.

  • Question for the ladies: do you nag him? Take out your disappointment on him with nagging bitterness? Do you in other words do nothing to help him? Or do you pray for him? Do you encourage him? Do you tell him you love him no matter what? Do you even notice this about him? Do you leave him for some other hot dominant sexy confident risky adventurous guy?
  • Question for you guys: If this were you, what would you do? Do you lay down and whine and feel sorry for yourself? Or do you get back up and try again?

The same can be applied to romance. Maybe there was romance before marriage or kids, but after it gets busy and that tingling feeling doesn’t come around as often. What do you do? Do you let it fall away or do you rekindle it? Ladies, do you complain? Criticize him for not being the alpha exciting man anymore?

On being a Christian Alpha.

Take Dominion. Genesis 2-3. Be fruitful and multiply. Take over the earth. Take over whatever area of life you get into. If it’s school, dominate it. If it’s a career, fishing, sports, marriage, whatever, do it with all your might. Every man wants to dominate, to win, to excel, to succeed in what he does. No one begins something in order to fail. Prepare, plan, practice, train, fight, win. Don’t give up. This isn’t a pep talk, it’s a way of life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WO4tIrjBDkk

Guidelines for Game

  • Men and Women are different. 
  • Can’t be friends. Never go the friend-zone route (pic). Notice his posture, his body language. 
  • Women won’t tell men how to be men; they’re expected just to know and already to be a man. Don’t look to her to set the line of purity, of limits, of when to do X. You lead her, like a dance. THE WHOLE THING IS LIKE A DANCE.
  • Don’t be needy/desperate, be independent. Don’t be the beta, especially the damaged-beta. Don’t sing those “Oh, save me” songs.
  • Don’t be the chivalrous white knight. More on Courtly Love. More on knights-errant.
  • Stay away from girls that pursue you. They’ll dominate you. They’ll pursue other guys. Girls generally don’t play the game. They are played. However, they do have a passive aggressive role. They manipulate in millions of little ways. They strategize, plot, set a man up to get him to think or do things without the girl being explicit.
  • Watch out for s# tests. Woman asks man question to gauge his manhood. Not always conscious on the woman’s part. But they all do it.
    • The more a man fails these tests from a girl, the more the girl will test him; over and over and over.
    • Don’t follow her emotions. Don’t let her induce in you any emotions. You are her anchor, emotionally. You steady her storm. She throws a test at you, you take it with ease.
    • Two types: 1) Bitter from past failed relationship now Feminist taking it out on you. 2) Beta Bait: trying to see if you’re beta or not: assuming you are, trying to put you there to see what you’ll do: trying to lower your status, especially beneath her.
    • Examples.
    • More examples, but indecent.
    • Feminism Is The Final Shit Test
  • READ JANE AUSTEN. Love is in the details. 

16 Rules

  • Make your mission your prioirity, not finding a woman. Women don’t want to be the center of a man’s existence. They want to be caught up along a man’s destiny as his helper. So many songs idolize women, make them the man’s savior, the thing he has been looking for, what gives him purpose. A woman – even if she says she does – does not want to be your purpose, your energy, your savior, your reason for existing. She is made to be your helper, not your project; your supporter not your savior. 
  • Don’t play by her rules. Women want to be led. Come up with a goal, plan, and execute it. Lead: morally, spiritually, materially, relationally. You set boundaries. You plan dates.
  • Don’t apologize unless you are absolutely wrong. Don’t use apologies to make things better or win her over. It’s weak and wrong.
  • Be irrationally self-confident.

Lewis on Chivalry

The sentiment (of chivalry), of course, is love, but love of a highly specialized sort, whose characteristics may be enumerated as Humility, Courtesy, Adultery, and the Religion of Love. The lover is always abject. Obedience to his lady’s lightest wish, however whimsical, and silent acquiescence in her rebukes, however unjust, are the only virtues he dares to claim…

French poets, in the eleventh century, discovered or invented, or were the first to express, that romantic species of passion which English poets were still writing about in the nineteenth. They effected a change which has left no corner of our ethics, our imagination, or our daily life untouched, and they erected impassable barriers between us and the classical past or the Oriental present. Compared with this revolution the Renaissance is a mere ripple on the surface of literature. There can be no mistake about the novelty of romantic love: our only difficulty is to imagine in all its bareness the mental world that existed before its coming—to wipe out of our minds, for a moment, nearly all that makes the food both of modern sentimentality and modern cynicism. We must conceive a world emptied of that ideal of ‘happiness’—a happiness grounded on successful romantic love—which still supplies the motive of our popular fiction.

Even our code of etiquette, with its rule that women always have precedence, is a legacy from courtly love

The love which is to be the source of all that is beautiful in life and manners must be the reward freely given by the lady, and only our superiors can reward. But a wife is not a superior. As the wife of another, above all as the wife of a great lord, she may be queen of beauty and of love, the distributor of favours, the inspiration of all knightly virtues, and the bridle of ‘villany’; but as your own wife, for whom you have bargained with her father, she sinks at once from lady into mere woman. How can a woman, whose duty is to obey you, be the midons whose grace is the goal of all striving and whose displeasure is the restraining influence upon all uncourtly vices?

Hello M’Lady Video, reads just like Authurian Romans by Chrétien de Troyes:

“After them the Queen mounts her horse, taking a damsel with her. A maid she was, the daughter of a king, and she rode a white palfrey. After them there swiftly followed a knight, named Erec, who belonged to the Round Table, and had great fame at the court. 13 Of all the knights that ever were there, never one received such praise; and he was so fair that nowhere in the world need one seek a fairer knight than he. He was very fair, brave, and courteous, though not yet twenty-five years old. Never was there a man of his age of greater knighthood. And what shall I say of his virtues? Mounted on his horse, and clad in an ermine mantle, he came galloping down the road, wearing a coat of splendid flowered silk which was made at Constantinople. He had put on hose of brocade, well made and cut, and when his golden spurs were well attached, he sat securely in his stirrups. He carried no arm with him but his sword. As he galloped along, at the corner of a street he came up with the Queen, and said: “My lady, if it please you, I should gladly accompany you along this road, having come for no other purpose than to bear you company.” And the Queen thanks him: “Fair friend, I like your company well, in truth; for better I could not have.”

 

 

Marriage

Marriage = Foundations of Society

“Whether we consult the soundest deductions of reason, or resort to the best information conveyed to us by history, or listen to the undoubted intelligence communicated in holy writ, we shall find, that to the institution of marriage the true origin of society must be traced.… To that institution, more than to any other, have mankind been indebted for the share of peace and harmony which has been distributed among them. “Prima societas in ipso conjugio est,” [“The first bond of society is marriage”] says Cicero in his book of offices; a work which does honor to the human understanding and the human heart.” – “James Wilson’s Lectures on Law”

“The foundation of national morality must be laid in private families.… How is it possible that children can have any just sense of the sacred obligations of morality or religion if, from their earliest Infancy, they learn their mothers live in habitual Infidelity to their fathers, and their fathers in as constant Infidelity to their mothers?” — John Adams, to his wife

“I consider the domestic virtue of the Americans as the principal source of all their other qualities. It acts as a promoter of industry, as a stimulus to enterprise, and as the most powerful restrainer of public vice. It reduces life to its simplest elements, and makes happiness less dependent on precarious circumstances; it ensures the proper education of children, and acts, by the force of example, on the morals of the rising generation; in short, it does more for the preservation of peace and good order, than all the laws enacted for that purpose; and is a better guarantee for the permanency of the American government, than any written instrument, the Constitution itself not excepted.” — Francis Grund, 1825

Realms grow out of provinces. Provinces out of cities. Cities out of towns. Towns out of families. Families out of marriages. Marriages are the beginning of society. “It cannot be denied that provinces are constituted from villages and cities, and commonwealths and realms from provinces. Therefore, just as the cause by its nature precedes the effect and is more perceptible, and just as the simple or primary precedes in order what has been composed or derived from it, so also villages, cities, and provinces precede realms and are prior to them. For this is the order and progression of nature, that the conjugal relationship, or the domestic association of man and wife, is called the beginning and foundation of human society. From it are then produced the associations of various blood relations and in-laws. From them in turn come the sodalities and collegia, out of the union of which arises the composite body that we call a village, town, or city. And these symbiotic associations as the first to develop can subsist by themselves even without a province or realm. However, as long as they are not united in the associated and symbiotic universal body of a province, commonwealth, or realm, they are deprived of many of the advantages and necessary supports of life. It is necessary, therefore, that the doctrine of the symbiotic life of families, kinship associations, collegia, cities, and provinces precede the doctrine of the realm or universal symbiotic association that arises from the former associations and is composed of them. In practice, however, all these associations are to be joined together for the common welfare of the symbiotes both individually and corporately. For the public association cannot exist without the private and domestic association. Both are necessary and useful in order that we may live advantageously.” — Johannes Althusius, Politica

“The records of history show a series of different societies, in different places, each rising to civilization as they become absolutely monogamous, achieving high culture while that absolute state is preserved, and falling into decline as it is modified or discarded. Just as societies have advanced from savagery to civilization, and then faded away into a state of general decrepitude, so in each of them has marriage first previously changed from a temporary affair based on mutual consent to a life-long association of one man with one woman, and then turned back to a loose union or to polygamy. The whole of human history does not contain a single instance of a group becoming civilized unless it has been absolutely monogamous, nor is there any example of a group retaining its culture after it has adopted less rigorous customs.”~~J. D. Unwin

Marriage isn’t primarily about you. Why does the whole town show up to a wedding? Why is the state involved? Why is the church involved? Why is the town (friends, family, etc) involved? Because Marriage is a social institution.

Men and Marriage, Changning Roles and Disincentives

  • Two forces at work: man are disincentivized from marrying at all and women are encouraged to postpone marriage and then to divorce and marry up.

Four Horsemen of Sexual Apocalypse: Contraception, No Fault Divorce, Workplace Equality, Welfare

  • Embracing no fault divorce is the natural result of elevating romantic love to a moral force.
    • The simple fact is the moment you attribute moral value to romantic love you are creating a rival to biblical sexual morality. In biblical sexual morality it is marriage that creates a moral space for sex and romantic love (with romantic love not separated from sexual passion). We have overturned God’s order here, and are now claiming that romantic love is the moral space for marriage and sex. This is deceptively subtle, and at the same time demolishes the moral meaning of marriage.

Against Men

  • “A man who is holding down a menial job and thereby supporting a wife and children is doing something authentically important with his life. He should take deep satisfaction from that, and be praised by his community for doing so. If that same man lives under a system that says the children of the woman he sleeps with will be taken care of whether or not he contributes, then that status goes away. I am not describing a theoretical outcome, but American neighborhoods where, once, working at a menial job to provide for his family made a man proud and gave him status in his community, and where now it doesn’t. Taking the trouble out of life strips people of major ways in which human beings look back on their lives and say, “I made a difference.” — Charles Murray. “Coming Apart.”
  • Dalrock: The wage gap is shrinking, but because men are earning less. Men are earning less not because women are out-competing them, but because they have increasing incentive not to over-produce for provision for families they are no longer sustaining. The state does that for women in their stead, so why should they do it for women?

Against Women

 

General Decline in Marriage (and Society)

History of Average age of getting married (scroll down a bit)

“In many modern societies, the advent of feminism has caused men and women to be placed on a more equal footing than ever before. The catch is that, in most of the societies in question, women, desperately trying to achieve what they see as equality, no longer bear enough children to maintain the population. Some countries, such as the U.S., are making up for the deficit by importing millions of foreigners. Others, such as Japan, seem resigned to gradual demographic decline and hope that robots will make up the difference. If demographics count for anything, the future of patriarchy— not the comparatively mild form of patriarchy that is said to have characterized the West, but the more rigorous Islamic variety—seems assured.”
— Martin van Creveld. “Equality: The Impossible Quest.”

Civilization is collapsing. Stop fucking around. Be courageous. Get married. Have babies. Save Western civilization. 

*All charts taken from Charles Murray’s Coming Apart.

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Chances of remarriage

  • Repeated studies show that a marriage is more likely to fail based on higher number of sexual partners a woman—but not a man—had before marrying (1, 2, 3, 4), a fact that should be obvious to any man who has experienced the highly impulsive and shallow behavior of easy women. The results of these studies clearly show that a marriage is at high risk of failure if a woman had more than two sexual partners before marrying.

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Single–Parent homes destroy children and society.

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Changing Roles

Women left the authority of a man at home and placed themselves under the authority of men at work. Furthermore, when women do what men normally have done, women find they need men less and therefore marry less and aim to marry less. Men also find that as they are needed less as providers, they do not work as much or produce as much or mature or take added responsibilities as though they were going to be husbands, fathers, providers, protectors – brave, selfless, stable, monogamous. They remain children, irresponsible, lazy, underachieving, poorer, wasteful, fun, healthy, sexy, mobile, uncommitted, etc.

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Women working actually harms women, men, children, families, society, and the economy overall.

  • Increase in labor supply forces wages to go down.
  • Female hypergamy, female independence, and opportunity cost reduces the marriage rate and the average birth rate, while increased male work hours and work-related romantic opportunities increases the divorce rate.
  • The reduced birth rate has a negative effect on consumption, and therefore the demand for labor, 20 years before the consequent negative effects on the supply of labor can help balance it out, putting further negative pressure on wage rates.

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More on the same subject:

All of this, because we no longer have traditional gender roles, marriages, families, homes. The sexual revolution has and is destroying our minds, our bodies, our souls, our families, our economy, our civilization.

Biblical Injunctions

It’s not good for man to be alone.

Be fruitful and multiply.

Fill the earth and subdue it. Take dominion of earth.

Honor your father and mother, so that you will live long in the land.

When to marry? When am I ready to marry? When do I know I have reached marriage stage? When to marry her/him?

(Resources for pornography questions.)

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